Wednesday, January 03, 2007

I hate shoes

Quote of the day: “Walk a mile in another man’s shoes. And soon you’ll be a mile away and have his shoes.” I don’t know who said it.

Song of the day: “I’m So Sick” by Flyleaf

State of mind: ouch.

Date: 1/3/07

My first post of the New Year and this is what it is about: shoes… and my intense hatred of them. I hate them. I hate whoever invented them. I’d like to chuck the pair I have on right now out the window and watch them get run over by something large and heavy. I may have mentioned my lousy taste in shoes, but I have come to realize that the problem isn’t with me. It’s with them. The shoes. The shoemakers. And even the kid at the shoe store that took my money. They all suck!
Well, ok, maybe not the girl at the store. I’ll leave her out of this.
In the past month I have purchased 1 pair of boots and 3 pair of shoes, 1 casual, and the other 2 for “looking pretty”. The only pair that I can wear are my boots, which isn’t much of an option now that New York has become practically a tropical paradise despite the fact that it’s January. I swear I try them on in the store, so I have no idea how this happens but I bring the shoes home and they morph into teeny tiny torture devices! My taste is rather generic when it comes to footwear. I only have two rules: no spiked heels and no toe cleavage. (It’s an actual thing, trust me.) I don’t like pointy toes, open toes, or the sandals with the strap that goes in between your big and next to big toe. If I could I’d wear sneakers every day. But I can’t. I’m supposed to ‘dress appropriate’ for the office or something. Whatever.
I got dressed this morning and selected what I consider a rather nice outfit. A simple skirt, cute sweater, and the denizens of all evil for my feet. The first pair I put on turned out to be too big. They weren’t when I tried them on in the store. Honest. I gave it a go with some tissue stuffed in the toes, but that didn’t work. Second pair of new shoes I put on has a strap that goes around the ankle that pulled every time I took a step. Again, they didn’t do that in the store. The third pair just made me want to cry. I finally dug out an old pair of shoes that slip on and as I walked back and forth from my dining room to the kitchen I couldn’t remember why I hadn’t worn them in so long. It’s two hours later and now I remember. Every step I take is like getting hammered on my big toe by a very very angry Nordic God.
I’m going to give it one last try. This weekend I am going to purchase a pair of shoes that not only look good, but also feel nice as I walk in them or so help me… I don’t know what. I’ll sue for the right to go barefoot? I’ll do something drastic. And probably stupid. I just haven’t thought of what yet.

Shoe quote of the day: “My shoes are too tight and I have forgotten how to dance.”
10 points to anyone who actually guesses the show this is from.


fermicat said...

It is sometimes difficult to find a pair that look great AND feel great, but I gotta admit I love shoes!!!. Especially boots. I'm wearing a pair of boots right now. Because it would look silly if I only wore one.

ctheokas said...

I'm going to go with Babylon 5 for the quote. I'll expect my prize in the mail by Tuesday of next week.

trinamick said...

I have a crapload of shoes. If I find one pair that is comfy and cheap, I buy two or three pairs of them and stash the extras away. I know that otherwise they will be discontinued.

That said, I wear cowboy boots, guy's shoes, and combat boots a lot outside the office. My mother says most of my shoes look like something her grandpa wore while mucking out the barn.

LL said...

I say go all urban cowboy on their eemas. Go for the roper lace ups and you'll be swimming in fat city forever. That is unless you have flat duck feet, in which case you might want to just go for the mukluks.

NYPinTA said...

ctheokas gets the prize! I don't know why I didn't think someone would get it though.

And I don't have flat feet. Just an FYI.

wa11z said...

So you have "cruel shoes?"

Ben O. said...

I've never heard that song of the day. It's amazing the things I don't know.

Ben O.