Friday, November 10, 2006

Crap. I’m getting old.

Quote of the day: "I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap." ~Bob Hope

Song of the day: “Signs, Signs” as covered by Tesla. (Originally by The Five Man Electrical Band)

State of mind: eh.

Date: November 9, 2006

The other day my clock radio turned on to one of the 90s most overplayed songs, “Signs, Signs” by Tesla- the band, not the inventor. I hadn’t yet gathered the energy to hit the snooze button so I let it play and these were the thoughts that went through my early morning, not yet awake head:

I must be getting curmudgeonly in my old age because when I was a teenager this song made complete sense to me. Now, I can’t understand what the singer is complaining about. Get a haircut, stay off other peoples lawns, some people like hanging out with only their friends and will pay for the privilege, and how in the hell does he expect churches to provide for the poor if they don’t have any money?? Ok, not everyone has to have a crew cut, but what job was the sign for? Would I want an un-hygienic schmuck working in a restaurant? No. Other than that, I don’t much care what someone one looks like but dress job appropriate, that’s all I’m saying. Maybe the sign on the private property is an animal preserve and they don’t want poachers. Did the singer ever think of that? His presence might actually be a danger to whatever slice of Mother Nature they are trying to protect. Maybe he shouldn't be so damn judgmental. (I think god has thoughts on that too.) And I’d like to see people dressing up again to go out to eat. Not because I think they should have to, but it would be nice to see others making an effort to look nice for their friends and family instead of looking like they just got done mowing their lawn. Will I be putting on heals and a set of pearls to do my grocery shopping? Hell no. Just put a little thought into where you are before choosing to don your ALF t-shirt. And I belong to a few clubs, sure they’re book clubs and don’t count, but I am a card carrying geek… I mean Sci Fi fan. I think maybe having to go through the hassle of applying for membership just to hang out with others with the same hobbies as you is just a demonstration of your interest in whatever it is you are hoping to join. And it’s nice that he left a note, but I’m pretty sure the idea behind an omni potent and omni prescient being is that he/she/it already knows how you are. And what you are doing. And that you need a haircut.

And the sign says "Long-haired freaky people need not apply"
So I put my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why
He said you look like a fine outstanding young man, I think you'll do
So I took off my hat, I said "Imagine that, huh, me working for you"

Signs, signs, everywhere there's signs
Fuckin' up the scenery, breakin' my mind
Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign

And the sign says "Anybody caught trespassing will be shot on sight"
So I jumped the fence and I yelled at the house
Hey! What gives you the right!
To put up a fence and keep me out, or to keep Mother Nature in
If God was here, he'd tell it to your face, man, you're some kind of sinner

Oh, say now mister, can't you read
You got to have a shirt and tie to get a seat
You can't watch, no you can't eat, you ain't supposed to be here

And the sign says "You got to have a membership card to get inside" - uh!

And the sign says "Everybody welcome, come in, kneel down and pray"
But then they passed around a plate at the end of it all
And I didn't have a penny to pay
So I got me a pen and a paper and I made up my own fuckin' sign
I said, "Thank you Lord for thinking 'bout me, I'm alive and doing fine", oh

Show quote of the day: “All I'm going to get out of him is a snappy one-liner and if I'm real lucky, a brand new nickname.”


trinamick said...

Wow. You've clearly given more thought to this song than I. But now you've ruined one of my favorite tunes for all time. Darn kids anyway. Who did he think he was anyway? If that song was written today, there would be a verse whining about people expecting those in public to pull their pants up where they belong. Oh, the horror!

wa11z said...

As a card carrying geek and long-haired freaky person, I take offense!! Not really - about the offense part.

LL said...

Wow... that just does not sound like a PinTA reaction.

I am rubbing off on you! Excellent...

NYPinTA said...

I didn't mean to give it so much thought!! I was half asleep! These thoughts were unbidden and ones that I have no idea where they came from.

LL, stop rubbing near me. Ick.

LL said...

*Pfft* Just think how boring your life would be without me rubbing near you?

If left to your own devices, you'd spend your life chasing after old guys and raising cats. It's good that you have a positive influence like me in your life. :ewink:

fermicat said...

Get a room, you two...

Beth said...

You know, I completely agree with everything you wrote in this blog and I'm not even half asleep. Help, I'm turning into my parents!

OK, wait, no ... just saw the dressing to go to dinner part. This is why I DON'T eat in restaurants. LOL