Friday, July 01, 2005


Quote of the Day: “Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.” ~Ed Gardner
“Music is essentially useless, as life is: but both have an ideal extension which lends utility to its conditions.” ~George Santayana

Song of the Day: “Queen of Hearts” Juice Newton

State of mind: hectic.

Date: July 1, 2005

I love lyrics. One of my favorite things in the world is learning all the words to whatever song I am fancied with at the moment. Last night I was watching Baby Hit Me One More Time (which is a phrase I cannot hear without hearing Britney Spears’s voice… damn her) and on the show was Juice Newton singing her early 80’s hit “Queen of Hearts,” which is the first song I ever learned all the words too; a fact of which I am still proud of to this day. She sings quite a few bits pretty darn fast too and I was only 8 when I memorized them. The fact that I frequently memorize lyrics probably also explains why I don’t have much room in my head for stuff I actually need...
Way back in High School my… hmm… obsession for lyrics got me both good and bad attention. Fellow classmates marveled when I had put all the words to “Stairway to Heaven” on my art portfolio and once I got called to the guidance counselor’s office because of lyrics to Metallica’s “One” made my trig teacher think I was going to off myself. I hadn’t finished the words, so I can understand how they might be a bit misleading. But it took me at least an hour to convince them the song was about a soldier getting all his bits blown off and not my desire to be dead. “But why this song?” she kept asking. It was the last one I heard before class! She was skeptical, but since I am still around we know who was wrong, don’t we?
Bands and artists that I think have really cool lyrics include: Tool, The Who, R.E.M, Matchbox 20, & Fiona Apple, just to name a few.

Also, I am such a dork. I didn’t realize that the 4th was this Monday and didn’t realize that I get a 3-day weekend! Come Monday, I might have driven to work wondering why there were so few cars on the road and then gotten supremely pissed when I got here and found the place all locked up!

My mother sent me these images via e-mail. So, if you think your job sucks...
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I might have to take one of those jobs if this article correct. Uh oh!

Angel quote of the day:
Wesley: I've been accused of a great many things in my time. But paranoid has never been one of them. Unless people have been saying it behind my back.

Happy Fourth of July!!


Henry said...

Didn't the Guidance Counselor kill himself?

John said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
NYPinTA said...

Should I change it from 'bits' to 'appendages' then?

NYPinTA said...

Hey! John, where did the song go?

John said...

I was confused about the your use of the word "bits" because I read the lyrics and didn't see anything about the war leaving him a eunuch.

There is a song called "Half A Man" by Stephen Lynch that could have also been titled "One":

All my days
I live with my disgrace
I’m afraid to show my face
Or at least take off my underwear

See I was born
Like a half-way neutered pet
I don’t have a matching set
It’s a part of me
That just aint there
Please, don’t stare

Well I’m a gambling man with out two dice
I’m like Uncle Ben with only one grain of rice
Oh to have two testes would be so nice
But I’m half a man
Yeah, I’m half a man

Wanna die
end it all, just call it quits
I can’t find a cup that fits
And at baseball games I feel so dumb
When I hear “ball one”

Oh, my God
How could you have been so cruel
To give me one family jewel
And the one that’s there must feel so sad
He’s a lonely nad

Well I’m a marathon runner with just one leg
I’m a fallopian tube with just one egg
Oh, I want another teste
Do I have to beg?
I’m half a man

Well I’m a Tweedle Dee with no Tweedle Dum
And I’m a Siskel and an Ebert with just one thumb
And I’m a Yo Ho Ho with no bottle of rum
I’m just half a man
Yeah, I’m half a man

John said...

" Hey! John, where did the song go?"

The place I pulled the lyrics from incorrectly had "man" in place of "nad."

Seriously, as I was reading this, I kept thinking back to wonder how I could have missed the part about the guy's nuts getting blown off, or at least one of them. (hence the name of the song.) I guess I'm just deranged. I'm cool with that.

NYPinTA said...

" I could have missed the part about the guy's nuts getting blown off, or at least one of them. (hence the name of the song.)"


trinamick said...

The first song I ever learned all the words to was The Devil Went Down to Georgia. My mother was so thrilled.