Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Knowledge is power, unless it is useless.

Quote of the Day: “I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect.” ~George Carlin

Song of the Day: “Break On Through” The Doors

State of Mind: according to the horoscope in my local paper, I am supposed to have a 5 star day, so, I guess I would say I am disappointed.

Date: 4/18/05

Life is about gaining knowledge, and stuff…lots of stuff. Today, one out of two isn’t bad, so I thought I would share a few things I have learned in the past few days:

1) Don’t kiss your pet on the head as you walk out the door if you have just put on lip-gloss; especially a cat that is shedding.
2) Saying, ‘because it’s Tuesday’ is a good excuse for being surely at work.
3) Fed Ex likes it if you have the correct address on shipments. Salesmen don’t care.
4) Any sentence is funnier if you add Vin Diesel's name to it.
5) Jim Morrison was not that good of a poet. Viggo Mortensen, however, rocks. (His photos though, baffle me completely.)
6) Any day gets better if you add chocolate.
7) Cardinals are not allowed any form of communication to the outside world when picking a new Pope, but apparently, bringing in CD headsets is ok. I wonder if it is a sin to listen to ‘Hooker With A Penis’ in the Vatican? And what happened to taking vows of… not having cool stuff… that priests take?
8) My mother really really really hates Kenny G. Mwuhahahaha.
9)John, aka generic_screename, has not yet updated his blog at random-squeegee.com with more fun times of the recent wedding he gave a speech at. :( Slacker.
10) And the last interesting thing I learned is: Americans eat 20 billion pickles a year. Billion. With a B. I’m just curious how they know that, because I have a suspicion that a good number of those pickles did not get consumed, but rather were used in 'sneeze gags' to freak out little sisters across the country. And I bet quite a few also end up being picked off with great fervor by those of us who can't stand them and despite begging that we get our burgers with out them, end up with a copious amount anyhow.
I remember that when my sister was pregnant, the first thing her husband did was go out and buy the largest jar of pickles I had ever seen. It was practically a keg. That jar stayed on the counter for 7 years. Un-opened. Eventually, when they moved, it got thrown out. (I think. I seriously hope they didn't pack it.)
So, there you go. Dont you feel smarter already?


Henry said...

Thanks for the lip gloss tip-but you said, especially when a cat it shedding--Is there a time when they arent?

NYPinTA said...

Well... no. But they do so less at certain times of the year. Like the last thursday after a full moon in the fall, (except when it rains), and for a week in late winter.